This is why you are having difficulties moving forward with your life.
My name is Leo Frincu and I am a 43-year-old man. I’m not sure whether you’ve noticed it or not, but it seems that almost everywhere you look nowadays, there’s someone trying to either motivate, inspire, or teach others how to go after their dreams. There are internet quotes, e-books, self-help success recipes, seminars, lectures — every possible tool imaginable designed to help others live their best lives.
I don’t know about you, but I don’t remember growing up in an environment with so many motivational resources available to the public, or the public, itself, being so desperate for inspiration and motivation to help them accomplish their goals. Perhaps people didn’t dream as big back then, or perhaps they didn’t really need motivation in order to go after what they wanted.
I’m not sure if having grown up under communism or having been a professional athlete has helped me to fully realize who I am or who I needed to become in order to be happy. But I have learned that often we hold ourselves back because of our inability to let go of the past and to just accept who we are. Often, we have a subconscious unwillingness to move forward. That unwillingness may not necessarily be because of what we need to do to accomplish our goals and live our best lives, but rather who we need to BECOME in order to achieve all of the above.
People accomplish goals based upon who they are, not necessarily based upon what they do. Therefore, instead of struggling with what you need to do, how about finding out who you truly are and let it all happen?
Think about this for a second. The lion doesn’t need to impress anyone. All he has to do is to just simply be THE LION that he is. The same goes for you. Once you find out who you TRULY are, things will slowly start falling into place. One way to discover more about yourself and your needs is to answer this simple but powerful question: WHY?
WHY do you need to have what you want?
WHY do you need to lose weight?
WHY do you need to feel sexy?
WHY do you need to feel strong?
WHY do you need to find a lover?
WHY do you need to make more money?
WHY can’t you just simply drink more water?
WHY can’t you just simply eat less?
WHY can’t you just simply wake up earlier to exercise?
WHY can’t you just simply do what you need to do to get what you want?
We all have the same needs and feel the same emotions. We all have fears and we all have doubts. We all need to be heard, seen, loved, validated, understood and accepted. We’re basically all the same. What separates us from each other is simply how we view ourselves. What we think about who we are will lead us either towards success, or the opposite. We see and deal with the outside world the same way we see and deal with our interior one.
Opportunities come to us according to our ability to recognize them and take advantage of them. Similarly, we create problems according to our ability to solve them. At any given time, we are either dealing with a problem, leaving a problem, or creating a problem. If you’re having difficulties moving forward with your life and your goals, it is because you haven’t found the answer to your WHY — or, perhaps, because you have failed to understand what you TRULY need to be happy.
The following are what — and who — you need to BE in order to reach the next chapter of your life:
- BE BOLD. YOUR LIFE is just a consequence of your decisions. A successful, fulfilling life is a direct result of making BOLD decisions. A BOLD decision is a decision made in spite of your doubts and fears. A BOLD decision isn’t necessarily moving to a different country and starting all over again. A BOLD decision could simply be acknowledging how you feel and efficiently communicating that to someone else. A BOLD decision is asking for what you want. A BOLD decision is choosing to be HAPPY. If you’re not HAPPY with where you are in your life, it is most certainly because you haven’t conquered your fears. We all have fears. There’s no courage without fear. THEREFORE, YOUR ENTIRE LIFE IS THE RESULT OF YOUR RELATIONSHIP WITH FEAR. Let fear motivate you to start making BOLD decisions in your life. EMBRACE FEAR AND LET IT BE YOUR CATALYST FOR CHANGE AND GROWTH.
- BE RESILIENT. It’s not how many times you fall that matters, but how many times you get back up that counts. Being resilient is FORGIVING yourself for the mistakes you’ve made. Being resilient is being FLEXIBLE with yourself. Being resilient is not taking yourself too seriously all the time. Your ability to quickly recover after a setback is crucial on your road to success. It doesn’t really matter what you say to yourself, as long it helps you get over a struggle and move forward. People who SUCCEED don’t succeed because they’re necessarily smarter or more creative than others, or that their ratio to failure is better than everyone else’s. They succeed because they have an INCREASED TOLERANCE for failures, paradoxically suffering MORE failures than people who don’t succeed. What separates people who ultimately succeed from those who fail is simply a larger number of “tries” and a WILLINGNESS TO KEEP FAILING. Resilience is your capacity to recover quickly from difficulties. INCREASE YOUR RESILIENCE AND YOUR CHANCES OF SUCCESS WILL INCREASE, AS WELL. Because life doesn’t get easier or more forgiving until we become stronger and more resilient.
God bless and GOOD LUCK.